Hold Me Tight - Summary and Key Ideas

Hold Me Tight presents Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) in a user-friendly format, offering readers practical steps to foster and enhance emotional connection in relationships. Through real-life examples and exercises, the book reveals the essential conversations that can build stronger, more secure bonds.

This book is designed for all couples, regardless of age, marital status, or sexual orientation, who seek to deepen their emotional connection. It is particularly useful for those interested in relationship improvement, emotional intimacy, and overcoming past traumas, but not recommended for those in abusive relationships or struggling with serious addictions.

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Hold Me Tight

Key ideas


Developed Emotionally Focused Therapy, strengthening bonds by reshaping key relationship moments.


Love is a vital bonding mechanism essential for human survival.

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Emotional disconnection in love triggers destructive cycles and insecurity.

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Emotional responsiveness fosters lifelong love and secure connections in relationships.

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Couples' negative cycles block emotional connection, fueled by attachment fears.

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Identifying and sharing emotional vulnerabilities strengthens relationship bonds and emotional support.

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Kerrie and Sal de-escalate conflicts by acknowledging patterns and sharing feelings.

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Open communication and emotional vulnerability build intimacy and security in relationships.

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Forgiveness heals wounds, rebuilding trust and resilience in relationships.

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Lasting passion in sex stems from emotional connection and secure bonding.

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Love fosters emotional health, personal growth, and strengthens overall wellbeing.

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Love's power heals trauma, providing strength and deeper connection.

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Summary & Review

Final Summary: "Hold Me Tight" by Dr. Sue Johnson lays out the principles of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), emphasizing the importance of emotional connections in maintaining healthy, loving relationships. Through a series of seven transformative conversations, couples learn how to build and strengthen their bonds by being more emotionally responsive and available to each other. The book underscores that creating a secure attachment is key to enduring love and provides practical techniques for couples to repair and deepen their emotional connections.

Sue Johnson

Dr. Sue Johnson is a clinical psychologist and a leading innovator in the field of couple therapy. She is known for her development of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and is a recognized authority on the science of love and bonding.


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